My Current Frustration

In my search for new blog post ideas, a title I came across was “a current frustration of yours”. Apparently, controversy gets traffic and naturally, I love to have a rant (who doesn’t?!), so today I thought I would grant you the honour of a rant about social media.

Now, this may be slightly hypocritical seeing as I am a social media user, and a pretty frequent user too, if I may add. Nevertheless, from several recent conversations, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m not the only one who despises social media and yet can’t seem to become unhooked.

But how can we become unhooked? The simple fact is that social media is playing a bigger role in our lives than ever before. We’re living in the epitome of technological advancements with robots, artificial intelligence such as Alexa, and voice recognition such as Siri. People spend more time living in a digital world on the internet than in the real world. We communicate via emojis, text abbreviations and selfies more than we engage in real-life, wholesome conversations. Take a step into any urban public area and I can guarantee you that you’ll immediately see dozens of people with their eyes glued to their phones, oblivious to the world around them. Living a life through a camera lens has become the norm and at almost every occasion, we focus more on capturing the perfect Snapchat story than we do on enjoying the present moment. We’re obsessed with the number of followers we have, and teenagers are so committed to keeping up their streaks on Snapchat that they will have literal heart palpitations if they don’t have phone signal for more than a day. (I was shocked when on my Silver Duke of Edinburgh expedition, my peers had gone to the extent of giving a friend back at home their Snapchat login details so that they could keep up their streaks…!) Every morning we wake up and the first thing we do is go on our phone. Every night we go to bed and the last thing we’ve done is look at our phone screens. How can we live our lives when we’re only present in reality half of the time? How can we see the world for what it is when everything is obscured by a filter?

If you’re reading this post, there’s a 90% chance that you’ve been linked to it from a social media platform- be that Instagram, Facebook, or Whatsapp. Likelihood is that you’ve also been mindlessly scrolling on your phone for the past half an hour or so, looking at celebrities, friends, or family’s photos. Now let me ask you a question. How does that make you feel?

If you’re anything like me, seeing other people’s posts on social media makes you feel rubbish. Even though I’m fully aware that everyone posts the ‘best side of themselves’ on social media, I can’t help but feel FOMO if I see my friends together, or a tinge of jealousy at someone who appears to be enjoying themselves on a holiday abroad. Now here’s the thing. As young people, we’re told that social media is toxic because we compare ourselves to other people. We see models with flawless skin, cruising around on yachts and living their dream lives. I can remember sitting through countless assemblies at school, when teachers would tell us to unfollow celebrities who make us feel inferior because they portray themselves as perfect and only show the best sides of their lives. But what about the people we do know? What about the familiar faces? Aren’t they just as damaging to our self-esteem and don’t they also warp our perception of reality?

We never seem to talk about this aspect of social media, and it wasn’t until I had a conversation with a friend a month ago, and again with another two days ago, that I realised it wasn’t just me who felt like this. I’d always just assumed that it was just my insecurities that made me feel this way, but I’ve now realised that many, if not all of us, feel exactly the same. People we have personal contact to- be that friends, family, acquaintances- and see on a day-to-day basis cause us to feel less worthy, as if we aren’t living a good enough life. However, we are well aware of at least some of the difficulties these people have in their own lives. But still, I can’t help but feel that they are better off than me in some aspect- be that socially, financially or academically. It’s absolutely ridiculous and social media has now become a platform to show off your life and compare yourself to others. This also got me thinking about something else. What did people think of me on social media? Did they think my life was perfect? Did they think I had a better body, hair, clothes? Well probably not (!), but I can guarantee you that at least one person did. And this is how I know: If I pick up my phone right now and scroll through all 200 accounts that I’m following, I can find at least one thing on every person’s social media account that makes me feel negative about myself. So, call me insecure if you want, but I’m sure that if you did the same, you would find at least one person you’re following who you think is better off than you just because of a photo on social media.

I find myself in a vicious circle on a day-to-day basis. How can I complain about other people’s posts/use of social media and yet have the audacity to only show the best side of myself when I post? By putting a filter on a photo, which I have undoubtedly taken at least half and hour to choose, edit and caption, I have put the ‘best’ side of myself out on a platform and made out that this is how I am every day. I hate seeing other people’s lives through rose-tinted glasses, so surely I shouldn’t be putting myself out on social media in a warped way- right?!

Unfortunately, the world we live in means that it’s pretty much close to impossible to live a life without social media, where everything and everyone is interwoven into the digital world. Even though I don’t agree with posting perfect photos on social media, I suppose there are only 2 solutions for me left: 

1.     Post EVERY aspect of my life on social media- the good, the bad, the ugly 

2.     Limit my posts and the number of different platforms I use for social media

Well, I’m obviously not going to choose the first option as I don’t particularly want the whole world to know about every single aspect of my life! So that only leaves option 2, which I will be opting for. I’m proud to say that I’ve never had Snapchat, in spite of constant pestering from friends and family to download the app. When I’m asked why I don’t have Snapchat, replying that ‘I don’t want to be glued to my phone 24/7 and fixated on keeping up streaks’, doesn’t quite seem to suffice for an answer. Personally, I don’t think I’m missing out on much and if anything, I would recommend deleting Snapchat if you have the app. Moreover, I also try to limit my use on Twitter because I find that I end up mindlessly scrolling through a barrage of negativity (cough, cough Trump), which obviously doesn’t help me feel good about myself. I’m trying to use social media less and instead concentrate on living in the present. I’m so tired of comparing myself to other people. And I know I’m not the only one. Social media is incredibly toxic, and eventually I want to stop using it all together. But for now, let’s just say I’m at least trying to reduce my usage. The most important thing to remember if you’re going to use social media is that: 

Just as your life isn’t perfect, neither is anyone else’s. 

And maybe next time you’re out, try and put your phone away (I know, radical suggestion) and actually engage in meaningful conversations. Trust me, it’ll do you a world of good. 

So, what do you think about social media? Do you agree with my opinions and what strategies do you use to limit your social media usage? Comment down below and subscribe to my blog to receive an update every time I upload a blog post.